Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Randomize
