your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
