Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
