He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize
