He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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