So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
