But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
