i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
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