scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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