You made me cry and you don't even care
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
