It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Randomize
