There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
