Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
