I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
