The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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