would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
