Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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