i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
