shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
