I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
