well I can't set my house on fire every night
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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