I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
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