id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize