Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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