I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Randomize
