i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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