It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
