I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
