I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
