I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I got inside last night via doggy door
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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