return my video game
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Randomize
