Farmville is her only friend.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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