the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
i am craving dick and cupcakes
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize
