fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
