just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
