Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
