Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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