Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
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