I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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