maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Randomize