Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize