I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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