think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
