Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
