i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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