She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
God, I missed his penis.
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