I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize