Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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