Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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