so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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