just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Randomize